Seriously, I needed some divine intervention today. I pray every night and every morning for patience, understanding, the ability to re-direct Makenna in a positive manner when she’s doing something she shouldn’t be, and most of all, for me not to become child-like in my reactions to her. FAILED!
I’ve already been on my knees once today asking/begging for forgiveness and I know I have more to do tonight. As I was doing this it came to me that I need to choose to exert the patience I’ve been praying for. God may have given it to me but I need to choose to use it. I don’t know why I have a hard time some days wrapping my brain around the fact that I have a two year old and not a twenty year old. So my trying to rationalize with her, or tell her why some things need to be done at certain times or why some things are not done just slip from me and I find myself getting really frustrated and angry.
I’ve realized that a lot of the times it’s because that I feel like I cut myself short on time. What I mean is that I’m “running” out the door to get somewhere on time or that I have this “sense” of what needs to be done at certain moments and not letting go. Knowing this, I try and give myself another 10-15 minutes leeway in leaving. I don’t always succeed, but when I do, I’m more relaxed and I can let her dawdle and stop to pick up every gross thing off the ground (well not everything.)
Then there are times like today that I forget that at 4pm, when she hasn’t had a nap yet, that she’s bound to not follow directions and fight me on anything and everything. When all I want to do is get her home and into a nap and all she wants to do is play with toys. Plus, going back to the “she’s not 20,” thing, I expect respect of sorts for treating her with a cookie after swim and all it really does is prolong getting her to her nap thus starting the cycle.
So I need to think of these things before getting irrational in my actions or responses to her. She’s two for goodness sake (almost 2.5!). Tonight was better. I had her help me make banana bread as she likes to pour things into the bowls and mixing. In fact, today, she was helping me mop. The video below was before I put water in the bucket. Then when I did put water in the bucket, she still helped and got a lot of water on the floor, but I was okay with that.
The good news is that I was able to go out and get a bathing suit this morning. I was so excited. I desperately needed a new one and the fact that I found one that fits and I could feel comfortable enough in made me happy. Plus, I got to try it out today during Makenna’s class.
Makenna did well, but had a hard time concentrating on what the teacher wanted, as did the other little boy. In fact, 10-15 minutes before the class was to end, the other little boy just quit altogether for the day. His mom was not in the pool with him but on the side and his grandmother was in the pool. But he wanted him mom and basically that was it for him. Makenna quit with about 5-10 minutes left in the class. But I still worked on some things with her as she played. Unfortunately the class isn’t being held next week, so we’ll have to definitely make sure we go Wednesday morning to meet with the other moms and kids.
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